*YAWN* Good morning…… =.=

*Stretch*  Good morning people!  I’m sitting here this morning before my computer with my coffee gazing out at the thick blanket of fog that has engulfed my beloved city of Toronto.  While it is very serene and all that, it’s also makes you want to nothing productive!  LOL  Well, that and the fact that the fire alarm went off 5 freakin’ times starting at around 4 am.  We had to do the old evacuate the building while the fire department came.  And wouldn’t you know?  It was a false alarm!!!  *Grrr*  To top it off, they decided to run a test on it at around 10 or 10:30 this morning.  So, broken and erratic sleep + fog-swaddled city = lethargy which makes it difficult to find that pesky and elusive employment.  >.<

Speaking of finding employment, I think I’m going to end up applying for jobs in the food services division.  Not by choice, not by a long shot.  However, I haven’t heard back from anywhere that I’ve applied and we may not even have the money to survive this month!  So, being picky is about to become so NOT an option.  Not to mention, a good friend of mine was going to come job hunting with me, but due to shitty rainy weather yesterday that was out of the question.  I need to give her a call and see if it’s still a go or what.  *shrugs*

I got some feedback from people on my last (and also first) post.  Y’know, my introduction?  I got asked if I was worried about coming off as an uncaring asshole.  I said no and what made them ask?  Hilariously, it was the part about my not giving a shit if people can’t handle the truth!  Seriously?!  O.o  My question to them was this: would you rather I lie to you and then hours, days, weeks….hell, years later you come at me whining about how you can’t believe I lied and your feelings are hurt and you just don’t know if you can trust me anymore; OR would you rather I tell you the truth and even though your feelings may get hurt, you can feel reassured that at least I told you the truth and you can go harp at the people that “call themselves your friends” by lying to you just to “spare your feelings” when in the long run it just does more damage than good in this game we call life?  My Gods people!  I don’t lie to my friends or to those that just tell me they want an honest answer, I can’t be bothered to lie; and just to spare someone’s feelings (which are going to end up hurt anyways)?  FUCK THAT!!!  I will go to the grave with a clean conscience and everyone else can live with the fact that Jonny was one of the few people that actually cared enough to never bullshit them.

*sigh*  Humans…..they never cease to amuse me by making things/life more complicated than it has to be!  ROFLMFnAO

Don’t get me wrong, I worry and stress too.  However, I’d like to think that I’m much more selective about what I stress/worry about.  Plus, there is a difference between the 2.  Hear me out.  I “stress” about if we’re even going to be able to afford to eat this month (meaning June).  I “worry” about the well-being of my friends.  IMHO, this is a good formula since I have absolutely NO intentions of losing my hair or getting an ulcer or any other health conditions (mental or physical) getting bent out of shape over stupid shit.  Try this ….mantra….if you will that works for me:  Is this a situation I have any control over?  eg. Can you control how China and Japan get along, the weather, force some one to hire you over thousands of other candidates, stuff that you CLEARLY can do NOTHING about?  If the answer is “no” then stop fucking worrying about it.  It’s stupid and not worth shortening your lifespan or losing your hair over.  If it’s something like merely going and applying for a job, whether or not you choose to answer the phone, exercise, have sex and with whom….THEN you have the choice, the control.  NO ONE ELSE!!!  And I can’t stress that enough; NOBODY ELSE has the power to tell you what you’re going to do or how you’re going to do it.  If you know someone in your life like that, THEY have the problem NOT you.  The only problem you have is the choice you make.  Are you gong to let others control you like a mindless puppet or are you in control to do what you want, when you want, how you want and with whom you want?  I recommend the 2nd choice personally.  I find better mental health that way.  Now this is not to say you don’t listen to others input and opinions.  Far from it!  Listen to them, take it into account.  BUT the final decision MUST be your own!  NOT “well this is what such-and-such says and they know what’s best for me”.  That’s absolute crap!  The only person who knows what’s best for you is you.  What the fuck do they know?  Is their life so fucking perfect that they have earned the omniscient right to make decisions and control the lives of others?  NO!  No one in all of history has EVER had that right and no one EVER will!

Now people might read this and wonder how the whole “people being completely honest with you” and “who controls your life?” thing tie together.  It’s easy.  By being totally in control of your life, your fate, your destiny and not letting others control it for you, you will quickly weed out the lying control freaks and who is real and truly cares about YOU and what YOU want.  The rest can go get stuffed!  :P  It sounds harsh, but if people can’t be honest with one another and for some reason feel the need to control others, they’re not worth the flesh they’re printed on!  I’ve lost many “friends” because of my mantra and my beliefs.  But, do I shed a tear over the loss?  Abso-fuckin’-lutley not!  I mean, how dare they even categorize themselves as “friends”?  Real friends DON”T pull crap like that.  They’re honest and there for each other and NEVER try and control you or tell you what’s best for you.  They’re straight up, offer their opinion and support you NO MATTER WHAT.

To close for now, I’d like to stress one thing: this is NOT directed at ANYONE in particular!  This is a life long peeve of mine and is something that’ll never change.  Do NOT come bitching at me or suddenly ignore me/”give me the silent treatment” because of my beliefs and opinions.  If you find yourself believing that this is a personal attack on you, not my problem.  Analyze yourself.  If you want my opinion, ask.  I’ll give it.  And I’ll still be the very definition of “a friend” (as stated prior).  This is a glimpse into beliefs that I hold strongly and dearly.

I look forward to hearing opinions and have a nice day!  :)